Getting Lucky Read online

  His Romy? Fuck that! Romy was just Romy.

  And then Camilla had told Romy that Matt would call her back, and that was a step too far in the proprietary stakes so he’d pulled the phone out of her hand fast enough to give her whiplash of the wrist and taken it into another room.

  Camilla had looked mightily displeased, but it was poor form for a guy to ask a girl about her menstrual cycle in front of someone she’d never met, so he’d left Camilla to it and launched straight into it with Romy via a short, sharp opener: Enough of this bullshit, how do we fix it?

  We can have an ablation, she’d said.

  Then have one, was his response.

  She couldn’t if she wanted a kid one day—which she definitely did, she’d explained—because there’d be no having one afterward.

  So have a baby now, he’d said, what was stopping her?

  Little problem of no man in her LIFE! And yes, she’d screamed the last word, because a cramp had ripped her in half at that exact moment.

  He’d paced the floor while she’d breathed through the pain, and then said, fuck it, he’d give her a baby—why not?

  And she’d said, Why not? Because it was a big deal requiring more than the one minute’s reflection he usually afforded life-and-death decisions.

  And he’d told her it sure as hell didn’t require her usual one thousand years’ reflection, and that it would make the top ten list of easiest things he’d ever fucking contemplated: a quick ejaculation on his side of the Atlantic, a turkey baster on hers, a courier in between, a baby at the end and Yippie-Kai-Yay motherfucker to the problem.

  She’d laughed so hard at the Yippie-Kai-Yay motherfucker she’d snorted, but she was crying at the same time, and then she’d said he was the next best thing to Captain America to offer, even if she couldn’t accept.

  And he’d snort-laughed then, insisting that Captain America was a virgin as well as not being the masturbatory type, whereas Matt had shot out so many gallons of semen over the years—with and without the assistance of a second party—he could have his own page in Guinness World Records so where was the comparison?

  And somehow during the ensuing argument over Captain America’s sexual expertise—or lack thereof—which they’d been having forever—Matt’s sperm offer had been accepted and general terms for proceeding agreed to, and he’d felt pretty damn happy with himself because hey, he was going to be a father, which he’d never thought he’d be.

  Correction: godfather.

  Because obviously he couldn’t be a real father.

  By that stage Camilla had left, presumably in a huff since he hadn’t heard from her since, and Matt had figured that was just as well since she probably wouldn’t appreciate his commitment to impregnating another woman even if he wasn’t actually coming within spurting distance of Romy’s fallopian tubes.

  And now here they were, and he felt pretty sure Camilla had jinxed him with the his Romy bullshit because his Romy wasn’t the Romy he’d opened the door to.

  His Romy had obviously been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a metamorphosed porn star version who looked exactly like his Romy—neat and chic, clean and bright—but was on a mission to drive him out of his fucking mind with the need to get his hands on her. Which he could not do, because his Romy, his real Romy, was off-limits.

  He wasn’t allowed to imagine taking his Romy against the wall energetically enough to shake the crystals off that god-awful chandelier. He would never have flung his Romy halfway across the hall for fear of what he might otherwise do to her! Because he would never have mistaken his Romy’s breathless Matt, please as an invitation to enact that shameful scene in his head when it was really nothing more than a plea to stop his rampaging dick from stabbing her in the stomach—and thank God she hadn’t called him on that but had taken pity on him by blaming a mythical case of jet lag for the whole damn disaster.

  And okay, taking the blame for him was something his Romy would do, which meant she really was his Romy and his alien abduction theory therefore was a bust.

  The only other explanation for this whole phenomenon was that it was an aberration brought on by his two-week sexual hiatus—and the fact he’d lasted two weeks without sex, ever since Romy’s phone call, was the equivalent of him being abducted by aliens and replaced with a choirboy version of himself!

  Matthew Carter a choirboy? Now, that was an aberration.

  As he’d hurried into the library and manhandled his chair into the best position for hiding the beast in his jeans under the desk—not without a certain amount of cursing and desk-related violence—he’d decided it probably wasn’t unusual for sex addicts to crave the first available person they saw during periods of deprivation. Didn’t mean he was going to act on it, though. He’d been keeping Romy safe from his perversions for ten whole fucking years and that’s how things were going to stay if he had to lock a chastity belt onto her himself!

  What the hell was keeping her, anyway? They should be halfway through her first document by now. The tedium of paperwork would put a stop to any weird-ass sexual cravings, so he wanted those damn documents stat! Bring them all on, the whole fucking briefcase full!

  He checked the time on his cell phone. She couldn’t be lost between the entrance hall and the library—only one door in the corridor was open and she’d have to see not only the glow of the lights but feel the heat from the monstrous fucking fireplace that was slowly stewing him in his own juice.

  Maybe he should go and find her.

  Take her by the hand...lead her upstairs...into his bedroom...strip her...lie her across the bed. Ash-brown hair tangled on his pillow...eyes a glitter of hazel from beneath those heavy, tilted lids that made her look perpetually, deceptively sleepy...mouth slightly open as she panted for him...tongue darting to lick her top lip...breasts round and heavy...beige nipples jutting proudly...thighs opening to reveal her pink, juicy core...waiting for his fingers...his tongue...his cock. A whimper, a moan, as he slid inside her...clenching around him...hips rising to meet his thrusts...

  Oh God, he wanted to come...needed to come.

  His heart was thudding the way it had in the entrance hall when he’d had his arms around her, his shoulders tightening, thighs clamping, his dick straining for release. And then the hairs on the back of his neck vibrated themselves upright as though a lover’s finger were trailing down his spine, and he realized he was no longer on his own in the room.

  He focused his eyes on his cell phone, counting out the seconds, willing himself to get it together before turning to confirm Romy’s presence behind him... aaand go...

  He swiveled his chair, and lust rushed at him like a bullet. He wanted to suck the breath out of her, rip the clothes off her, lick the scent from her skin.

  What the fuck was happening to him?

  “Sorry to make you wait,” she said, her trying-but-not-quite-making-it smile telling him she felt his tension. “I had to call Lennie to report on last night’s restaurant.”

  She’d taken off her overcoat, and when she paused on her way to the desk to drape it over a chair he saw what she meant about bursting out of her clothes—her bodice was skintight, and she looked ripe as a ready-to-eat-immediately peach. He really didn’t think he was going to survive tonight.

  “It’s two in the morning in London,” he said, the snap in his voice a symptom of his overwrought edginess.

  “So?”

  “So don’t try telling me you called Lennie.” Not that it was anything to him if she called Lennie at two in the fucking morning.

  “I...I did,” she said, and blushed, defensive. “Chef’s hours. I couldn’t have called him any earlier.”

  “Yeah, well, Lennie’s an asshole, expecting you to report in after every meal,” he grumbled, and swiveled his chair back to the desk, because the blush pissed him off and he didn’t want to see it. Not that it was anything to him wh
o she blushed over, but she shouldn’t be blushing over Lennie of all people. “You’re a restaurant consultant not a slave.”

  She’d reached the desk and took her seat, holding her briefcase on her lap as though it were that chastity belt he’d told himself she needed. “You know I have to jump when he says jump.”

  “I know you can’t trust a guy who fricassees garden snails,” Matt said, because he didn’t trust Lennie. Lennie thought he owned her.

  She gave an agitated little huff that told him he was being a dick. “And here I was thinking you might have given up burgers for escargot.”

  “Why would I do that?”

  “The house...this room.” She looked around. “Your tastes have changed.”

  “It’s just a library.”

  “Yes, and it’s very library-like,” she said, looking around again. “Hmm. It reminds me of the library in Teague’s family’s place in the Hamptons. All those shelves full of...of books.”

  “Hel-lo! Library!”

  “Yes but the chairs, tables, Persian rugs, velvet curtains. That fireplace! Big enough to incinerate an elephant!” She laughed, but it sounded forced. “Remember that time we were all invited to the Hamptons for the Hamiltons’ Fourth of July ball? Even Veronica was wowed by the library!”

  “You went into raptures over it, too, so what’s the problem here?”

  She grimaced—grimaced! What the fuck!

  “I just...wondered if you’d bought the place already furnished, that’s all,” she said.

  “Why? Because I don’t have Teague’s good taste?”

  “Well, you don’t, actually. Nobody does! But what I meant was that not even you could get all this done in a week.”

  “Oh.” He shrugged, suddenly self-conscious that it hadn’t been furnished, that he’d hired people to do it, that he’d told them to copy Teague’s style and to get it ready in a week in time for Romy’s visit. The library, the kitchen, two bedrooms—his and a spare in case she decided to stay—and an outdoor table, two chairs and a patio heater so they could eat breakfast on the deck tomorrow, because the deck wasn’t as oppressive as the rest of this fucking ginormous house. And now it felt all wrong. “Look, are we going to spend the night talking about decor or can we get on with the business at hand?”

  “Okay!” She huffed a breath in and out as she pulled a sheaf of pages out of her briefcase and put the briefcase on the floor beside her chair. And then she frowned at him. “You know all this paperwork is only to help you make an informed decision, right? I’m not here to torment you with red tape.”

  “I’m not tormented.”

  “You sound tormented. You look tormented. You—”

  “I’m not tormented!”

  Pause. “Let me put it a different way.”

  “Fuck!”

  “If you’re having second thoughts about giving me your sperm, I’ll let you off the hook, no questions asked.”

  He almost laughed at that! “Romy, I’m having so many thoughts about giving you my sperm I can barely keep up with them—but not one of them involves being let off the hook.”

  “I just want us to be...you know...normal.”

  “So we make that a nonnegotiable condition, okay? We stay normal or it’s off.”

  “Yes, but—”

  “Jesus, Romy, move things the fuck along or I’ll think you’re having second thoughts!”

  She opened her mouth, closed it, opened it, closed it, opened it, and all that drawing attention to her mouth was not helping because it made him want to kiss her! And then, “Fine!” she said. “Fine. If you’re sure.” She sorted agitatedly through her paperwork. “Here,” selecting a page and holding it out to him as she placed the rest on the desk in front of her.

  He took the page. “What is it?”

  “A waiver my lawyer drew up for your protection.”

  “Protection from what?”

  “From me. Think of it as the prenup you have when you’re not getting married.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me!”

  “I’m not going to have people say I baby-trapped America’s favorite dot-com billionaire.”

  He stared at her for one long, fraught moment. And then, “Okay,” he said, and read the document. “Right.” Looking up. “Got it.”

  “Read it again.”

  “I don’t need to read it again, Romy.”

  “Yes, Matt, you do. You make decisions too quickly. And this is important. Important enough that you might want to have your lawyer read it. In fact, you should get your lawyer to read it.”

  “I don’t need my lawyer to read it, because I’m not signing it.”

  “Well, of course I’m not expecting you to sign it right this minute.”

  “I’m not signing it, period.”

  “What?”

  “Will this make it easier to understand?” he asked—and ripped the page in half, dropping the two pieces back onto the desk.

  “Why did you do that?”

  “Because if you think I’m going to sit here on a fortune while my kid lives on a budget on the other side of the world, you’ve got rocks in your head. I may know fuck-all about being a father, and we both know I’d be a shitty role model for a kid—”

  “You would not!”

  “—but one thing I can do, and do easily, is money.”

  “I don’t want your money, Matt.”

  “The money’s not for you, so get over it. You’re getting just about everything you want out of this deal, Romy, and that’s fine. That’s great. I’m cool with it. But for the love of God, stop rubbing in the whole I-don’t-need-you-Matt thing.”

  “Rubbing—? Need—? I don’t—!” She peered at him as though trying to dive into his brain. “I don’t understand. All I’m trying to do is protect you!”

  “I don’t want to be protected. I just...” He stopped, dragged in a slow breath. “I just...want to do this.”

  “You are doing this. You’re providing half the chromosomes.”

  “Yeah, anyone with a dick can do that.”

  “But I want your dick,” she said.

  They looked at each other in shock—and then they both burst out laughing. And God it felt good. Back to normal. Almost.

  “Is that a Freudian slip?” he asked. “Because hey, come on over to my side of the desk.”

  “Oh, shut up.”

  “Look,” he said, “seriously, what difference is it going to make if I fling you a few dollars? I could support a hundred kids and not notice the outlay.”

  “It’s not supposed to be about buying a baby.”

  “I’m not selling one.”

  “It’s not fair to you. Not when you’ll have a real family one day.”

  “You are my real family. You, Rafael, Veronica, Teague, crazy Artie.”

  “You know what I mean. What happens when you get married?”

  “I’m not getting married. No other kids. This is it for me. My one chance. So don’t take it away from me over something stupid like money.”

  “Are you blackmailing me?”

  “I’m appealing to your kind heart.”

  “You are so full of it!”

  “Okay, I’ll switch to blackmail if you’re going to be mean about it. I’m making it a nonnegotiable condition of my participation. No money, no kid.” He picked up the pieces of paper. “Now, are we starting negotiations on the same torn page, or not?”

  “Blackmail isn’t a negotiation.”

  “Ticktock, time’s a-marchin’.”

  “Yes, but it’s my clock that’s ticking, not yours. You have all the time in the world to have other kids.”

  “Don’t want others. I’m good with clocks. Might as well synchronize my alarm with yours. Are we on? Decide.”

  “I don’t—I can’t—I’m
not...not like that. I don’t make decisions on the fly.”

  “But I do, Romy. And things work out just fine for me. So decide. Now.”

  Long, long moment. And then, “Okay,” she said, the word sounding as though it had been dragged out against its will. “I’ll take the money, but I want it tied up in a trust. I mean it, Matt. No sneaky stuff. No saving me from imaginary destitution on the sly. I’m getting my lawyer involved—I’m warning you.”

  He dropped the paper pieces. “Just so you know, I’ve already got my lawyer on the case, and I’ll bet she’s scarier than yours. If I want to sneak money to you on the sly, it’ll be done before you know it’s happening and there’ll be nothing you can do about it.”

  “Now you see, that’s your inner superhero waving his flag. You think you’re saving a damsel in distress, but I promise you, I’m not in distress.”

  “Have you thought that maybe this isn’t about you, it’s about me? How do you know I’m not the one buying a baby?”

  “What? No!”

  “And if I told you straight out that I am?”

  “I guess I’d ask why you chose me.”

  Their eyes met. Held. Something flashed inside him. Hot. Vivid. “And I’d answer...because it’s you,” he said. And the instant the words were out, he knew they were true. He was doing this not only for her, but because it was her. Because she was the one pure thing in his life and he needed her and if they shared a child he’d always have her. And his child...? Well, of course he had more to offer his child than money: he had her. Her light, to cancel out his darkness.

  “Oh!” she said, blinking furiously.

  Shit! “Don’t go troll on me,” he warned.

  “I won’t. I promise. It’s just...nice. To hear that.”

  “Yeah, well, don’t get sentimental about it. It’s to my benefit to give my kid a good mother. Less chance it’ll want to come and live with me one day.”

  “Oh!” she said again, and gave a tiny sniff that freaked him out.

  “Jesus, Romy! Get a grip. Are you on hormones or something?”

  “No. No, no, that’s just nice to hear, too. In a...a twisted kind of way.”